The Boss says, "Youstillwork here? I thought I downsized you last week." Asok says, "Um...I don't think so." The Boss says, "Check your spam folder after the meeting." Dilbert says, "First recession?"
…Here's my vacation schedule." "Good." "Whoa! You're planning to take more vacation days than you've accrued." "It's okay because I'll accrue the days before the actual vacation." "No can do. What if you quit before then?" "I'm literally afraid to hear the answer to that question." "Think, man! If you…
…quit?" "That's easy." "Hire an aggressive replacement for Ted who will share his resources and make his job unbearable." "These are my pants." "Are youstill here?"
"Wally, I'm glad we work in the same department." "Because your performance is so bad that you'll be downsized first." "You're like a buffer. As long as you're stillhere, my job is safe." "And there's nothing you can do to change the situation." "Wally, do you mind giving my family a ride to church…
…says, "If this thing works, it will forever change the way that mothers use the telephone." Dilbert says, "We've been on the phone for half a minute. The noise should start at any moment." The woman says, "Here it comes." A toddler walks into the room and yells, "Hey! What are you doing on the phone?…
…Dilbert says, "Okay... I think we're done here. Lots of work to do. Busy, busy, busy." The coworker begins to shake and transform. Branches sprout from his head and arms and his lower body becomes a tree stump. Dilbert is unaffected. He says, "I'll talk to you later. Have a nice day. Bye-bye. Thanks.…
