…of people trying to make a trivial decision." Dilbert says, "It makes me lose all faith in humanity." Dilbert says, "Food doesn't taste as good when you have no hope." Dilbert says, "I'll just get something from the vending machine and fantasize that my co-workers are competent." Dilbert says, "Let's…
"I hired an unqualified crony to run our quality control group." "I value loyalty over competence. That's the sign of a great leader." "Do you see any problem with that?" "It makesyou look extra disloyal?"
…be the most expensive bidder." "Bid low. We'll make it up with change orders and unexpected essential upgrades." "In other words, I've been randomly assigned to create lies for a proposal we can't win for a service we can't perform." "Youmakecompeting sound bad."
…because the user won't give me his requirements." The Boss replies, "Start making something anyway. Otherwise we'll look unhelpful." Dilbert says, "So, our plan is to cleverly hide our competence." The Boss responds, "You think too much."
…boss is making the engineers compete in an 'Iron Man' event. It's supposed to improve teamwork." Dilbert sits on the couch and says, "I'm glad I take the stairs sometimes instead of using the elevator. I'm in pretty good shape." Dilbert flexes his arm and feels his bicep. Dogbert says, "Yes, you are, to…
…"My competition is Dilbert and Alice, with whom I compete for salary increases and rare promotion opportunities." The Boss says, "I meant our external competition." Wally says, "Tell me again what we make." Dilbert whispers to Wally, "No raise for you, idiot boy."
