The Boss says, "How's everything going?" Dilbert says, "It couldn't be worse." Dilbert says, "I was the only person who said this project is a bad idea. Then you assigned it to me." The Boss says, "It's funnier when I make them say it." Dilbert says, "Grrrr"
Coworker says, "Your idea has already been tried by others and it failed miserably." Dilbert says, "Were those other as skilled at implementing ideas as you are at evaluating them?" Coworker says, "Of course they were!" Dilbert says, "Can you tell him to stop insulting himself?"
Dilbert says, "In this country, it is customary to respond to a question with something called an 'answer.'" Dilbert says, "Your approach is more like what I would expect to see if clothing were used as bags for meat." Dilbert says, "Now I will ask my question a seventh time..." The Boss says, "Stop…
…disagree with you, Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Actually, you don't disagree with me." Coworker says, "I don't?" Dilbert says, "No. You think you disagree with me, but you're mistaken." Dilbert says, "You're simply experiencing an illusion caused by the limits of your comprehension." Dilbert says, "If you were…
…to become more of a big picture guy." Wally says, "Lesser minds can do the managing and implementing while I criticize them for not 'getting it.'" Dilbert says, "So? you want to get paid to be a jerk?" Wally says, "Said the implementer."
The Boss says, "I hired a consultant to help us evolve our products to cloud computing." Dogbert says, "Blah blah cloud. Blah blah cloud. Blah blah cloud. Blah blah cloud." The Boss says, "It's as if you're a technologist and a philosopher all in one!" Dogbert says, "blah blah platform."
