Dilbert is standing at The Boss' desk and says, "We added a new performance test, but learned that the test itself is flawed. Now our product fails our own tests and our customers are asking to see the tests results. Do I have permission to fake the test data?" The Boss then says, "I didn't even know…
…quality testing, even temporarily, it will make me appear grossly overpaid." Dilbert says, "That impression could work against me during my next performance review." Dilbert says, "A one percent difference in pay, compounded over the rest of my life, is big money." Dilbert says, "Obviously my best strategy…
Morgan: The man with no communication skills Dilbert says, "Did you get results from the stress tests yet?" Morgan says, "Stress tests have to be performed under controlled conditions." Dilbert says, "Has anyone ever explained to you the yes-no form of questions?" Morgan says, "Is it my turn to talk?…
Performance Review The Boss says, "You need to get better at anticipating problems." Dilbert says, "If I could anticipate problems, I wouldn't have agreed to work for you." Dilbert says ,"You seem angry, I did not see that coming."
The boss says, "Our next presenter is Dilbert." Dilbert says, "I put together a slide show and video." Dilbert says, "While it's running, I'll perform a humorous rap song about the benefits of our product." Dilbert says, "Then each of you will wear a funny hat and participate in a skit." Dilbert says…
The Boss says, "We have new software for performance reviews." The boss says, "It has a category for everything." The boss says. "Fish-faced nincompoop! Bingo!"
