The Boss says, "Bob is the director of purchasing. He's here to describe our new procurement process." Bob says, "Our system divides products into two categories: Things you don't want, and things you're not allowed to buy." Bob says, "It's my way of saying thanks for lubing my SUV with my dead ancestors…
Mordac the Preventer of Information Services Mordac says, "It's time for your operating system upgrade." Dilbert says, "Gaaa!" Dilbert says, "Please don't! My CMS software won't work with the new operating system. I'll be a technology have-not!" The Boss says, "It's never good when they wear costumes…
The Boss says, "I need you to go to Elbonia and do some hand-holding while they cut over to the newsystem." Dilbert says, "Because they're incompetent?" The boss says, "And lonely." Dilbert says, "I'm not comfortable with this." Elbonian says, "Mud wine?"
Wally says, "I spent the first part of the week installing our new productivity software." Wally says, "Then I used the rest of the week trying to make it interface with our time reporting system." Wally says, "So far all it can do is tell me how much time I'm wasting in this meeting."
…to the same country as the package, shoot him with a tranquilizer dart, and hide the package under his hat." Carol thinks, "The first day of any newsystem is always a problem."
Dilbert says, "My new assignment is 'troll in charge of the legacy systems.'" Dilbert says, "I guess I shouldn't complain. I'm lucky to have a job in this economy." The Garbage man says, "Would a free bag of garbage make you feel better?" Dilbert says, "A little."
