…you the information you need to make the right decision." woman says, "I see your job as e-mailing me links to web sites full of stale and incomplete information." Dilbert says, "Can we go back to pretending I'm useful?" woman says, "Sure. I'll give you a pity listen."
"Dogberts Consults." "Never listento your customers." "They were dumb enough to buy your product, so they have no credibility." "That reminds me: thanks for buying my services. Don't talk. Shhh." "Ooh."
"As VP of marketing, I am proud to introduce the new version of our product." "BEHOLD!!!" "This is a testament to what can happen when you listentocustomers." "We asked customers what they wanted the new version to do." "Six months ago I gave that raw data to you engineers. Today we see the result…
…to a slide and says, "As requested, I put together a list of functions we should outsource." Dilbert continues, "I limited my list to things we don't do well." The Boss and Wally listen as Dilbert's voice continues, "Marketing, quality control, engineering, finance, human resources, and customer support…
…support advice." The next slide is of a customer leaning back with one hand on the phone and the other holding his stomach, saying, "So... hungry." The Boss continues, "... Stretched our telephone hold times to lethal durations..." Wally, Dilbert, and Alice listen as The Boss' voice continues, "... And…
…the ball with you for one day to symbolize your commitment to teamwork." Dilbert, Wally, and Alice listen as The Boss' voice continues, "Who wants to be first?" The Boss turns to Dilbert. Dilbert says, "Not me, I have a meeting with customers today." The Boss turns to Wally. Wally says, "I'm on vacation…
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