CEO says, "Assemble the supreme leadership board. I am ready to name an heir to succeed me." Dilbert says, "We don't have a supreme leadership board, and this isn't a hereditary dictatorship." CEO says, "That's crazy talk." Monkey says, "Ignore him Daddy."
…says, "Make your employees less productive. That way your CEO will let you hire more of them." Dogbert sys, "Inefficiency is the same thing as leadership. A king needs an entire country just to wipe his?" The Boss says, "Brow?" Dogbert says, "I was going to say windshield." The Boss says, "Brow is…
…with saliency bias…" Dilbert says, "…Added herd instinct, a pinch of confirmation bias… and here's your strategy." Dilbert says, "Just add leadership." The Boss says, "Why do I always get the hard part?"
…management system?" Dilbert says, "Your leadership has taught me to give you laughably unrealistic timelines, then blame others when I miss deadlines." The Boss says, "You're not even doing that right." Dilbert says, "I guess I need more of your leadership."
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Catbert says, "Leadership is the art of trading imaginary things in the future..." Catbert says, "For real things today." Catbert says, "If you work all weekend, you might be promoted someday, if there's ever an opening... and no one else is more qualified.…
…of the company." Carol says, "My only emotion is anger. You can have as much of it as you want." The boss says, "Maybe I can inspire you with my leadership." Carol says, "I feel like I'm wearing concrete underpants."
