Wally says, "There were eleven ways to interpret the vague assignment you gave me by voicemail." Wally says, "Given the risks of choosing wrong, and my engineering oath to do no harm, it was my ethical duty to do nothing." The Boss says, "You could have asked for clarification." Wally says, "Sounds…
Woman says, "Wally, can you attend my meeting Friday?" Wally says, "I'm very busy, but I'll meet you halfway." Woman says, "What does that mean in this context?" Wally says, "They say half of life is just showing up." Woman says, "So? you will be..." Wally says, "Doing the other half."
Wally says, "Does my new goatee make me look manly and intellectual at the same time?" Dilbert says, "It makes you look too lazy to shave around your lips." Dilbert says, "And I think I saw a flea." Wally says, "Yeah. That one is resistant to soup."
Wally says, "I get sleepy in the afternoon. And I'm not a morning person." Wally says, "I'm at my best for about an hour in between, which explains why I'm an exceptionally good lunch eater." The Boss says, "How's the workforce skills assessment going?" Catbert says, "I just sold all of my company…
Carol says, "For the past five years I've managed your calendar based solely on what would create the least work for me." Carol says, "It all started when you told me to use my judgment to set priorities." Carol says, "In retrospect, you should have hired someone with low self-esteem."
Wally says, "I'm on my way to a meeting with a prospective customer." Wally says, "We have such a long sales gestation period that the value of my efforts won't be known for two years." Wally says, "Just remember that optimism looks exactly like doing nothing."
