The boss says, "This is Phil, our new vice president of marginally legal activities." The boss says, "He'll be leading the effort to make our user interfaces so confusing that people have to pay us for training." Dilbert says, "We already do that unintentionally." The boss says, "Sure, but we can't…
…need you to pretend you're several different customers and write positive reviews." Asok says, "Doesn't that break some sort of law?" The boss says, "Heck no. it only crosses some ethical boundaries and violates the term of service for the web site." The boss says, "And depending on your religious views…
"Do you have a minute?" "No, I'm busy." "When would be a good time for me to come back?" "Come back when I'm not busy." "Aren't you always busy?" "Heck, no." "Sometimes I'm in between doing one thing and doing another thing." "When will that happen?" "It's unpredictable." "Ask Carol to call you when…
"Dilbert, this is Amber Dextrous, your new co-worker." "Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you." "She's going for the hug." "Oh heck, I'll just go with the flow and for once not be the socially awkward one." "She wasn't going for the hug. She shakes with both hands." "She's the perfect employee. She can…
"Heck" "We're out of space, boss." "We've had a big upswing in people who use cell phones in bathrooms." "Dang. I've got a new guy coming in today. Where will I put him?" "Maybe you could ask your brother." "Hmm..." "Well, I suppose you could put him in a cubicle." "His crime wasn't that heinous."…
