The Boss says, "I hired the Dogbert Technology Hospice Service to ease the suffering of our dying technology." The Boss says, "Dogbert will use compassion and... what was the other thing?" Dogbert says, "Bazooka." Dogbert says, "Step away from the Windows XP!"
…"I've decided to dabble in crime. I need some henchmen. Are you in?" Asok says, "What does a henchman do?" Wally says, "A henchman's job is to be gunned down in reverse order to his importance." Asok says, "How important am I?" Wally says, "I wouldn't pack lunch for orientation day."
…freelance I.T. support...and donating blood...and working as a male escort." Catbert says, "I don't need the details." Asok the intern says, "Running guns...Robbing graves...Starting a hedge fund..."`
Job interview Dogbert says, "Would you take a bullet for the team?" Dilbert says, "Um...sure." Dogbert says, "Good. The team is already at the firing range waiting for you." Zing Zing Zing Dilbert thinks, "Stupid weak economy!"
Police Negotiator "SURRENDER NOW AND YOU WON'T GET HURT!!!" "Here he comes." BAM BAM BAM "I'll leave an evaluation form. Please let us know how we're doing." "Done deal."
"There seems to be more stupidity than usual at work." "Borrow my anti-stupidious gun. It annihilates the stupid part of a person and leaves the rest intact." "Cool" "I should have read the directions more carefully."
