The Boss says, "Our policy is to put people in careers that match their looks." Asok says, "I thought that was a coincidence." The Boss says, "Your botched nose job makes you too unconventional to be an engineer." Asok says, "No!" Woman says, "Welcome to the art department." Man says, "Man, I wish I…
Career Day "Class, today Dilbert will tell us what a career in engineering is all about." "My job involves explaining things to idiots." Then the idiots make decisions based on misinterpreting what I said." "Then it is my job to try and fix the massive problems caused by the bad decisions." "Eventually…
"I was an engineer before I got into marketing, so I have a few suggestions for your network design." "Get rid of this 'Cisco' doohickey, whatever it is, and put it in a catapult made from local trees." "Has it been awhile?" "At least I have good social skills now, you dipweed."
"I was an engineer before I moved to marketing." "now I don't even remember how to turn on my Lisa." "You have an old Lisa computer from Apple?" "Old wife."
…says to The Boss, "Please, I beg you. Transfer me back to engineering." Dilbert continues, "I'll take a pay cut. No, I'll work for free. No, I'll pay YOU." Dilbert is shining The Boss' shoes. The Boss says, "I should make all of my engineers work in sales for a while. You come back more appreciative…
Tina says to Alice, at Alice's cubicle, "Alice, I need a career that has job security." Tina says, "Teach me to be an engineer. I don't care if it takes all day." Tina says, "But don't tell anyone; they'll all try to get in on this scam." Alice makes a mad face.
