The Boss says, "Can you put the PX9 system on the R3 network?" Dilbert says, "Yes." Dilbert says, "But just to be clear. What an engineercando is rarely what he should do." The Boss says, "What should you do?" Dilbert says, "Apparently, your job."
…"I cannot meet your arbitrary deadline, so the engineer's code requires me to kill myself with a lightsaber." Dilbert says, "But lightsabers haven't been invented yet. The best I cando is annoy myself with a flashlight." The Boss says, "Could you do this in the hall?" Dilbert says, "Annoyance before…
Man says, "We haven't heard from engineering yet. What do you think, Alice?" Alice says, "I think several mediocre minds concocted an impractical plan." Man says, "Can you be more specific?" Alice says, "Sure. You're one of them. And this guy is another."
…"It's a measure of how rude I can be without fear of consequences." Dilbert says, "You have no budget to give me a raise, so I have no potential gain from acting professionally." Dilbert says, "And it would be inconvenient for you to fire a highly experienced engineer and try to bring a new one up to…
Wally says, "And obviously I can't do anything until our floom vendor updates the glimrods." Man says, "I'll bitspew a protopatch to your glimrod array and you can get right to work." Sometimes a young engineer challenges the dominant work-avoider in the herd. Wally says, "Oh, really?" Wally says, "Too…
…to seem good than to be good." Being Good (overrated) Director of Marketecture says, "A misleading benchmark test can accomplish in minutes what years of good engineeringcan never do." Alice says, "Is it our maturity that makes that concept sound okay?" Dilbert says, "I hope so."
