…material in my garment I can use less soap and water on laundry day." Dilbert says, "And the extra freedom of movement will allow me to mouse more efficiently." Dogbert says, "This has to stop. I'll be back in a few minutes." Dilbert says, "Did you use my shaver?" Dogbert says, "Yes, and I will trim myself…
…and ask him." The Boss says, "I CALLED THIS MEETING AND IT'S NOT A MEETING UNTIL SOMEONE'S TIME GETS WASTED!" Dilbert says, "I apologize for my efficiency." The Boss says, "Apology accepted."
…call my invention a carbicle." Dilbert says, "It's 50% car, 50% cubicle, and 100% awesome." Dilbert says, "it is the ultimate expression of human efficiency." Dilbert says, "Rarely does an engineer get to create something so perfect that it can never me improved." Dilbert says, "I hesitate to use the…
Tina the tech writer "As you requested I increased the speed of my writing." "My breakthrough was realizing that accuracy and clarity are optional!" "Would you like to micromanage me by reading it all and pointing out the errors?"
Tina the tech writer "I decided to base your salary on the number of pages you write." "Fine. I'll give you a high volume of low quality work." "Sometimes the best you can do is move the hairball to another pocket."
"I found a clever way to write my application code in one hour!" "Normally this sort of thing would take weeks." "I assume my high level of efficiency will be recognized and rewarded." "Let me know how that works out for you." "You did all of that in one hour?" "Yes. I did." "From now on. I expect you…
