Ratbert's customersupport Ratbert says, "You're speaking to a powerless rodent." Ratbert says, "My job is to prevent you from getting to anyone who is authorized to give refunds." Ratbert says, "I'd like to begin by asking you some creepy personal questions."
Dilbert says, "Customers can't figure out our user interface. the boss says, "They should read the manual." Dilbert says, "Our manual is more confusing than our user interface." The boss says, "They can use our online support database." Dilbert says, "That's more confusing than our manual." The boss…
"Asok, I need you to fill in at tech support for a few days." "You'll be the guy who asks the customer for information, then transfers the call to another person who asks exactly the same questions." "Wouldn't that make me a barrier to progress?" "Only if the other guy actually helped."
…company is going out of business and won't support this product." "What's a length of time between two months and never that would cause you to buy now?" "One year." "Our new model comes out in a year." "I'll wait until then." "You're the worst customer ever."
"Dogbert's Tech Support: "Please fill out the online customer satisfaction survey." "Um... But you haven't even tried to help me yet." "I like to base my help on how happy you expect to be."
