Wally says, "There were eleven ways to interpret the vague assignment you gave me by voicemail." Wally says, "Given the risks of choosing wrong, and my engineering oath to do no harm, it was my ethical duty to do nothing." The Boss says, "You could have asked for clarification." Wally says, "Sounds…
Dilbert says, "Amber, would you like to celebrate New Year's Even with me?" Amber says, "I'll say maybe. That way you can't make other plans and I can wait for a better offer." Amber says, "I can get away with it because of whatever is happening over there." Dilbert says, "Yup."
Coworker says, "Did you read my long e-mail?" Dilbert says, "Not yet. What's it about?" Coworker says, "I can't say." Coworker says, "If I tell you what I wrote, the effort I put into writing the e-mail will be transformed into a waste of time." Dilbert says, "I just decided to delete your e-mail…
Woman says, "Wally, can you attend my meeting Friday?" Wally says, "I'm very busy, but I'll meet you halfway." Woman says, "What does that mean in this context?" Wally says, "They say half of life is just showing up." Woman says, "So? you will be..." Wally says, "Doing the other half."
Wally says, "Does my new goatee make me look manly and intellectual at the same time?" Dilbert says, "It makes you look too lazy to shave around your lips." Dilbert says, "And I think I saw a flea." Wally says, "Yeah. That one is resistant to soup."
Dilbert says, "What are you up to?" Dogbert says, "I'm recalibrating my lack of faith in humanity." Dilbert says, "Will this take long?" Dogbert says, "No. I start by reading opinions on message boards and?" Dilbert says, "I can come back later." Dogbert says, "You ignorant juicebag!"
