Dilbert says, "I cannot meet your arbitrarydeadline, so the engineer's code requires me to kill myself with a lightsaber." Dilbert says, "But lightsabers haven't been invented yet. The best I can do is annoy myself with a flashlight." The Boss says, "Could you do this in the hall?" Dilbert says, "Annoyance…
The Boss says, "And I'll need that by the end of day." Dilbert says, "I will gladly rush to meet your arbitrarydeadline so my work can sit in your e-mail inbox until next week." The Boss says, "I'm still within hearing distance." Dilbert says, "Oops. You usually scurry away faster."
"I can't develop an automated testing system by the arbitrarydeadline you set." "Try working smarter, not harder, with a sense of urgency, and a bias for action." "Or maybe you could do something differently." "I'm not the one who can't get his work done."
"Is it more important to follow our documented process or to meet the deadline?" "I only ask because our deadline is arbitrary and our documented process was pulled out of someone's lower torso." "Where's your artificial sense of urgency?" "Teamwork killed it."
…time sheet to Carol sitting behind her desk and says, "Here's my time sheet, including guesses for the next two days so I can meet your arbitrary clerical deadline." Dilbert continues, "If anything important comes up, I'll ignore it to preserve the integrity of the time-reporting system." Carol asks…
