"I'd like to take advantage of our new family friendly policy." "Three of my kids have bronchitis, two have dental appointments, one is in a school play, and one has a rugby game." "In all likelihood, you will never see me again." "We didn't think this through."
"Our vendor's rep says they can't deliver the parts for three months." "That just means he promised the parts to some other customer who did a better job of threatening him." "How about if I say we'll never buy from you again?" "I'd say you're not exactly buying from us now."
…making second rate products to sell to idiots so our executives can afford trophy wives." "Have you tried yelling until your face turns purple?" "Make three copies, please!!!" "This is new."
"The woods are full of people who want your job." "These days you can't shake a tree without three or four engineers falling out." "I'd love to stay and chat but I need to go motivate the other headcounts."
Dilbert is giving a presentation. He says, "The original schedule looked like this..." Dilbert points to a slide and says, "One month for a management decision and one year to do the project." The Boss, Wally, and Alice listen as Dilbert continues, "The revised schedule is this..." Dilbert…
…interview Matt for our department." Dilbert asks Matt, "There's a three-year gap in your work history. What were you doing?" Matt replies, "One day I was balancing my checkbook and noticed a bank error." Matt continues, "So I embarked on a three-year mission to make the bank admit its mistake!" Matt continues…
